The Art Of Faux-pression: Giving Them What They Want

After a year of "Faux-pression", (a term which means that everyone thinks that I should be depressed, but I'm really not, but acting the part for their sake.) I decided to record my thoughts. Just in case you need to act "faux-pressed", here's how:

1. Stay in bed a lot...A Whole Lot. You're not in bed for any other reason than the new mattress feels good. Plus, the less that I use my joints, the longer they'll last. Genius!

2. Don't answer the phone. As it's ringing, delight in the fabulousness that is Godiva Chocolate.

3. When people start talking about how bad things must be for you, just agree. Internally, I simply laugh. I'm really good at that! Yes, I have aches and pains, but who doesn't?

I have too much to be thankful for to be depressed, dammit! When will people get that?